Salmon & Asparagus

I got a good slap across the face on Friday. I'd given a (what I thought was) nice gift to someone I love. It was the new Weight Watcher salad bowl, and I filled it with jewelry. 

Well, the person I gave it to saw it as a gift that said I thought she was fat!

Then I said that was not the case. Then I said, let's wait until the after Christmas sales to get our gifts for each other. She took that to mean, we should wait until she loses weight before we get her some new clothes.

When I step in it...I step in it deep!

I tried explaining, over and over again, but I don't think I got too far. I was feeling like a total dweeb.

It was then we went to lunch. Great! I was upset, and I was walking into the most fabulous restaurant around.

I sat down, looked at the menu and ordered. 

Broiled salmon, and steamed asparagus! Coffee and water!

I did not break my promise to myself. This is the first time I walked into a restaurant and ordered a meal that wasn't on the "Last Meals" list.

Even though I was upset and wanted to overeat, I didn't. Score one for me!

Weighing In

Well folks, after tracking everything I have put into my mouth for yet another week, I lost three and a half pounds! Make a total of seven pounds in two weeks.

Now I am not crazy enough to think that this will continue until I reach my goal, I do know that I am having far more luck with this plan now that I have honestly been tracking and not sneaking in those BLT's!

I've incorporated healthy snacks into my daily eating plan, as well as limited my fruit and gone for the vegetables when I am hungry. I'm learning to enjoy celery and carrots!

And I am learning to drink a lot of clear fluids. Iced tea, hot teas, even, dare I say it, water!

During the next week my plan is to try to move more. Walk the dogs a bit more, perhaps do a shopping mall walk with my daughter and grand daughter.

And I suppose keep on doing what I've been doing. After all, right now, why tinker with perfection!

The Day Before

Usually the day before I weigh in I am filled with dread. However the last two weeks back on plan, I find I am really looking forward to Wednesday morning.

I have literally written down everything I have put into my mouth. I have planned, I have really worked it, and I feel good.

I admit that in the past I sneaked BLT's (Bite's, Licks, & Tastes). Then I found that I was hiding food. Or eating things when mu husband was out. Totally reverting to past behaviors.

The new 360 program got me thinking. Over breakfast I started to think about lunch, dinner and plan my snacks as well. I feel good about this.

The last two days I've been a little hungry in the afternoon. So I have a nice fresh stalk of celery, and I fill it with a tbs of hummus. Almost no points and it give me a good crunch!

Tea has also been a friend for me. Both iced tea and hot tea. All herbal teas with no milk.

Well, I'll post tomorrow after I weigh in!

Taking Care Of Yourself

My mother called me this morning. She is pretty much of a shut in now due to medical issues, and she was fretting about Christmas gifts. She wanted me to get a doll for for my grand daughter, and then she said, "Oh and you and your husband should go out somewhere and have a nice big meal on me!"

After hanging up I started to think of all the places I love going to because I can get things like fried clams, or steaks and fries or even the juiciest hamburger with fries. Not to mention the wonderful desserts!

I walked out into the kitchen to make breakfast and literally took a few steps when it hit me..."That is old thinking! That is unhealthy thinking! I do not need to go there!"

Over breakfast I thought about what I would do. She is sending cash, and I can basically do what I want. Here is what I have planned.

On New Years Eve I am going to buy 2 nice Lobsters. I will bring them home, bake two nice potatoes, and steam asparagus, and happily ring in the New Year!

Another revelation was that Mom is the one who is always telling me that I am a St. Bernard! That I will never be thin. Then she gives me gifts guaranteed to make me gain weight.

I can take control of my life and my eating, and do it with a smile!

Denial

It's funny, but I was thinking about how hard I worked the first time I reached my goal weight. I was scrupulous in my journaling, and the weighing and measuring of all of my food.

Then I played a few games that ultimately led me to gaining back about 30 pounds! I only weighed in once a month. I won't do that next time. I will weigh in each week. When I gained weight, instead of stopping my wayward eating, I ignored it and told myself I was holding fluid. (Right! Like 15 pounds, was just a little overnight fluid gain!)

I got sloppy with the weighing and measuring of my food, and when I did weigh in and gained, I would chalk it up to having had an emotionally bad week. As if eating away my unhappiness was somehow okay.

Then, since I had donated all my big clothes and only had 8's 10's and 12's in my closet, when I reached the point of not fitting into the twelves at all, well that really caught my attention.

I refused to go out and buy more clothes, that meant I could only wear the yoga pants I had. With long sweaters. However, they were not long enough. My hips and thighs were always trying to sneak out and humiliate me!

An entire closet of clothes going to waste! I could not deny it any more.

I think we all go along the river of denial! Something along the way will rock the boat, and suddenly we can't deny it.

What opened your eyes?

Thee & a Half Pounds!!!

I leapt out of bed today. It was one week where I had written everything down, honestly measured all my foods, and started to write on the Blog again! All very positive things! I was so nervous because I just know that my body can sometimes just not cooperate at all.

However I lost 3.4 pounds this week! And I earned every pound of that coming off.

I stepped up my non existent exercise from none at, to walking my three dachshunds around the yard and up the drive.

I wanted to have a good week. I knew if I cheated in any way, the scale would know. You can only fool yourself for so long before not only does the scale become your enemy, but so does every piece of clothing in my closet and dresser!

Things are still tight, but I am psyched and I will make this work for me. No back sliding this week, just more onward and down-ward!

I could really get used to losing weight every week!

Bikinis & Short Shorts

Only a few more days now, until I weigh in. I am so excited, because I have had a great week. Despite having Christmas all around me, I have stayed on plan. 

I have kept fruit on the shelves, and my fridge is filled with vegetables. I also did something I do not usually do. I got some fat free deli turkey, and have been having that each day for my lunch! 

When I have felt tempted (I am not that much of a saint!), I have made myself some hot herbal tea, and tried to get myself into a relaxed chair, and meditate.

"Bikinis and short shorts and jeans that look sexy, tank tops and dress pants and me looking happy."

I know, it doesn't rhyme, but it's kind of my mantra these days.

Currently the bikini gets lost in my extra weight, and the short shorts reveal two extremely overweight thighs. (I think the joke is: two pigs in a gunny sack! But I will not be so unkind to myself!)

Each day I put on my jeans, and I can tell that things are going in the right direction. The jeans I wear right now, are always big on me when I am at my goal weight.

Wednesday can not come soon enough for me!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzip!

Okay, I am well into the first week of honestly being back on plan. I woke today and I didn't feel nearly as "fluffy" as I have been feeling. I wanted to run in and weigh myself, but I stopped.

You see, I know myself pretty darn well, and I can become obsessive compulsive about weighing myself, and this can only lead to total disaster.

You see, if you weigh in every single day you will get depressed. Maybe one day you are holding fluid, so your weight is up a pound or two. That would be enough to completely undermine me!

So I'm not going near the scale unless it is at class. Yep. Once a week, I will get into my shorts and tank top, kick off my shoes, and step on their scales. Then, be done with it for another week.

Now I do have one thing that is sort of a ritual for me, besides a pair of light weight shorts and the tank top (worn strategically under my clothes, year round, until after I weigh in), I don't eat breakfast or drink my coffee until I have stepped on that scale. I just know that my cheerios, 1/2 a cup of milk and banana weight at least three pounds! (lol!)

So what are some of your weigh in day rituals?

I go on Wednesday, but I can already tell you that I can zip a pair of jeans. Not easily, but I do not need the hydraulic pliers either!

I Am Not A St. Bernard

Since renewing myself with the WW plan, I have worked so hard to stay on the straight and narrow. It starts out easy and then I call my mother. We all have someone who seems to work at making us feel bad about ourselves. That person for me is my mother.

Today I called and I was explaining to her that I had put on a little weight and that I was working the program hard to get back in the saddle.

It was then that she began to tell me that basically I'm not ever going to have a skinny body because I am a Saint Bernard. Yes, my sister is a whippet (my sister is her favorite) and I am a Saint Bernard!

I caught myself buying into her hyperbole, but then I came up short and put up the wall that says "NO NEGATIVE THINKERS ALLOWED"!

I made both breakfast and lunches that were right on plan. Nothing was going to stop me, that is for sure.

So don't buy into it when those negative people try to tear you down! I may not be a whippet, but I can be the healthiest, and well shaped woman that I can be!